I'm not sold on the title of this blog so if you have suggestions I'm curious...Most people know that I'm a Field Representative... Field Lady...Field Girl...Never a Field Woman..for an agricultural commodity organization in NC. Let me mention that this is MY blog and these thoughts are MINE and not necessarily the offspring of any given thing. Moving on...I spend roughly 4-6 hours of my work day sitting behind the wheel of my Chevy Silverado visiting offices or farmers in my territory aka district. I often think of my district like The Hunger Games districts but that's a story for later. Anyway, no single day is ever the same but I am always in my truck which affords me lots of time to stare out the windshield, tap on the dashboard, think, talk on the phone, perfect my singing crescendos, oh and maybe drive. Hence "The Dashboard Diaries."
I've felt the urge for some time now to get back in to writing and blogging. I can't write in a paper journal to save my life. I remember as a very young child I begged my mama for this cheap lock and key diary. I carried it around like it was my most prized possession and when my brother John stole it and opened it only to make fun of me for it being empty...boy I was pissed....I mean mad. It was still MY DIARY. Various paper journals and randomness later I still can't settle in to writing down my feelings and when I read back over whatever I write it doesn't have the life that I think so many of my experiences deserve. Several years ago I went against my better judgement and began to chronicle my life as a graduate assistant and accompanying adventures with my friends on a blog. Up until that point, I must admit I thought blogs were for self help, sharing recipies, or for people that lead very interesting, exciting lives i.e. not me. I found that my blog allowed me to capture entertaining, fun, sad, deep, crazy, philosphical thoughts about God, my life, my family, friends, and anything else. It allowed me to share things about myself that I wouldn't otherwise verbalize because let's be real...I suck at verbalizing sometimes. It got to the point where I didn't care if other people read it and now I want that back.
About a month ago I was sitting alone in my office brooding and decided to read through my old blog "Seasons of Love." I hate it when I'm brooding because I make stupid decisions.... Like impulse shopping but worse. I say things I haven't thought through, throw away things, eat bad food, get tattoed, chop my hair off, etc.... Later I feel ignorant and I try to make it right. Well I downloaded the posts from my old blog and deactived it. 3 years of chronicling the ups and downs of my graduate school shenanigans and some very personal life events were put to bed. When it got to the point where I couldn't stand it anymore and I decided I wanted to blog again I really just wanted to pick up where the old blog left off but sadly there isn't an option for that or I'm too technologically illiterate to know how to revive it. Maybe it's for the best... bringing some of those posts back would be like raising the dead. Some of the old posts from "Seasons of Love" may get reposted just for kicks and giggles but a new blog could be much more fun and creative...like constructing a Frankenstein. Why am I referencing horror-type things like raising the dead and Frankenstein in reference to my blog? No I'm not obsessed with darkness...although I have been called dark and twisty. Frankly most of my writing is fairly scary... Especially if you start looking closely at the grammar. :)
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